Helping Students Learn Social and Emotional Skills

When we think about social and emotional learning skills, a variety of skills come to mind. In this article, we’ll look at three: relationship building, decision-making and problem-solving, and building confidence.

Relationship Building

Relationship building is a crucial social skill. Students respond more positively to scaffolding when you have a positive relationship with them. Tom Roderick, executive director of Morningside Center for Teaching Social Responsibility and author of A School of Our Own: Parents, Power, and Community at the East Harlem Block Schools, describes several community-building activities to foster a culture of respect.

Another way to help students build relationships is through specified roles and responsibilities. Tamara Willis, seventh-grade social studies teacher at Sullivan Middle School, chose this approach after her students complained, “School is like a job and … we should get paid for attending.” Her students voted to create a business, which was named Sullivan University. Students prepared resumes and applied for positions (dean, professor, and intern) and interviewed one another for the jobs. Those students who were hired to be deans held an executive board meeting with Ms. Willis to form teams and design new classroom rules to address issues related to poor behavior and absenteeism.

As the experiment continued, students began to demonstrate leadership by quieting their peers when they were disruptive. The result? Attendance increased, students were more engaged in instruction, and discipline referrals decreased. 

Amber Chandler, author of The Flexible SEL Classroom, provides a template that can be used with projects. Students apply to complete a project, specifying what they will do, how they will do it, and how they will present it. They must also describe how they will use their time, and who will assume each rule. By doing so, they learn to work together in a group. 

Decision-Making and Problem-Solving  

When students are given opportunities to make decisions and solve problems, they can see the steps that make up the whole. This is a critical part of scaffolding. Decision Charts are a way for students to view an issue from a variety of perspectives and finalize a decision. Following the template below, students write the issue. Next, they write the different options that could occur in response to the issue. Finally, they write the pros and cons of each response. The charts can then be used as a starting point for a class or small group discussion, an essay or extended response, or a debate.

Cubing allows students to look at a topic or issue from six perspectives to solve a problem. At a basic level, the sides of the cube are labeled who, what, when, where, why and how. Students would then write about or answer the questions for each side of the block. You can use cubing to ask students to solve problems such as: Who is the hero? Who is the villain? What is the best solution? Which choice should I make? 

When I was teaching, I used more sophisticated prompts for writing. They required my students to move beyond a basic answer to more complex responses.

One benefit of cubing is that you can use a variety of prompts, depending on your specific grade level and/or subject area. A caution, however: Be sure your prompts are appropriate for the topic, and encourage higher-level thinking, rather than just being a cute worksheet.

A final way to use cubes is to write different assignments on each side of the cube. Students can “roll the cube” physically or electronically (random.org) to determine their activity, or you can assign specific sides to them. It’s a great option for differentiating instruction.

Building Confidence 

Many of our struggling students lack confidence. They don’t believe they can be successful, especially in school, and they may be resistant to scaffolding. One of the first things you can do is to encourage your struggling learners.             Many authors distinguish between praise and encouragement. Richard Lavoie, in The Motivation Breakthrough: Six Secrets to Turning on the Tuned-out Child, points out that praise is conditional; you receive it when you have done something. Encouragement, on the other hand, is unconditional and can be used even when a student is unsuccessful. It is not judgmental.

Years ago, I saw a cartoon that exemplified the difference between praise and encouragement. It showed a cartoon character fishing. In the first frame, the character caught a huge fish, and others were congratulating him. That’s praise. In the second frame, he caught a shoe. None of the bystanders spoke to him except one little boy, who said, “You did catch something. That’s better than nothing. Are you going to try again?” That’s encouragement. 

Encouragement supports students and focuses on progress. You can do this through praise, but there is a different emphasis with encouragement. Rather than comparing a student to others or a set standard, encouragement values the student, not the performance. 

Next, you can provide activities that will build confidence in your students. I asked my students to do a timeline of their achievements. They could put anything they were proud of on their timelines, both in and outside school. We also provided space to add items throughout the year.

Another way to build confidence is with Three Good Points. At the end of every day, students write “Three Good Points” in a journal or planner. It can be something good that happened to them, an accomplishment, or a way they helped someone. By journaling them, they can reflect back when they are struggling to remember they can be successful. 

A final way to build confidence is to help students reframe their internal conversations from negative to positive. You may have to model this multiple times, as well as posting sample positive comments to help students. 

A Final Note

There are a wide range of social and emotional skills students need to be successful. Building relationships, making decisions and solving problems, and building confidence begin to create a repertoire for students.